The Secret of Communication

It is quite clear today having a conversation with another person can be a challenge, have you ever been in the middle of a sentence and the other person’s phone is making some sort of a noise? Could be a call, text email, notification of a post on social media of some other annoying noise coming from that devise. We’ve moved away from a one on one conversation and into a new way of connecting with people. No question we all feel frustrated when we are in the middle of a word and the other person looks at their phone. I’ve done that also, human mistake.

Yet as annoying as it is we somehow tolerate this behavior every day. Like there’s something so important that’s going to happen in the next five minutes. We forget the impact this has in our ability to actually hear what the other person is trying to say to us. Often times they become upset and never completely explain what’s on their mind. What’s worse we tend to never ask questions of respond back right away, that phone is ready to tell us a secret right? Even if we don’t look at our phone down deep we’re wondering who is trying to get a hold of us. We all have a common need which is to be heard with the understanding of what our issue is. Even if they don’t always agree with you, that fact they listened is what we all seek.

Over the years I’ve been blessed to have been exposed to some great people who understand the importance of listening. Doesn’t matter what your business is or your personal life listening is a connection to which the people you are working with or trying to establish an understanding to an issue directly related to their life. One day I was on a conference call with a group of people, at the time a mentor I was working with had me conduct the call, we were having a discussion related to a new business model which affected our current businesses. I started off the call and my partner took it over after about 30 minutes. It was a learning experience but successful, at the end of the meeting we opened up for questions.

When the first couple of participants were speaking I thought it was going to be a long night however when the first person was taking a long time to elaborate on his issue with the model my partner asked questions, what he was doing was trying to develop a deep understanding of the mans issue, this went back and fort for a while however, we all could understand his issues in a deep manor after the rather long conversation. After the call my partner and I spoke about the first questions we’d received, he said Steve if you want people to move in the direction you want you must help them decide. By asking questions you develop a bond between you and the person in question.

Not one time did we interrupt the person speaking they said what was on their mind and each concern was addressed which was like having another sales person sitting right next to you. Although we were not sitting in a room together, people got a sense what they were saying was being heard in a deep level. My partner was sincere in his approach which was why this conference was as successful as it was. Bottom line no matter who you are talking with or what the issue is, Listen, don’t look around the room, instead look the other person in the eye and be interested not interesting.

We have two ears and one mouth so we need to listen twice as much as we speak.

Start today, you’ll be glad you did!

~Stay Strong~