by stevengconnelly@aol.com | Oct 21, 2016 | Uncategorized
Every day the sun comes up and offers us the light of a brand new day, an opportunity for a fresh start for the day, as Sunday approaches we begin to look at the week ahead. At the end of the month it’s time to set our sights on the month ahead. On January first the new year begins and we can forget about the past year and begin with a fresh start. Sound Familiar ?? We’ve all heard people say forget the past, move on. Or maybe you’ve heard that saying..“What Happens in Las Vegas Stays in Las Vegas.” The past is like a ball and chain holding you back, right? However did you ever stop and give that a thought? What I mean is, did you ever consider what happened in the past has helped you to be the person you are today? Sidney Poitier grew up in a little house on Cat Island in the Bahamas, the house he lived in had no running water and no electricity, his parents earned some money from their tomato farm which gave them enough to barley get by. Sidney would go swimming, collect fruit, climb trees, he was free to roam and explore anywhere on the island. There was plenty of time to be still and think. At night he sought comfort with his parents on their porch as they would sit and fan the smoke from green palm leaves they’re burning to shoo the mosquitoes and the sand flies. His life was simple, some people would consider that living in poverty. It was a place of gorgeous beaches...
by stevengconnelly@aol.com | May 20, 2016 | Mindset, Uncategorized
Have you ever been in a conversation with someone and they made you feel like your the only person in the room? It didn’t seem what you were taking about they were interested in every word you said. How did that make you feel? Like you were important, or they understood what you meant! To be a good listener you first must be a part of the conversation. Most people like to talk about themselves, however we tend to want to come right back and say something about what’s on our mind instead…Think of a conversation as energy, if the other person is speaking encourage them to keep talking, ask questions, let them feel comfortable and they will speak more openly and honestly. Begin by making eye contact, this demonstrates to your partner you are fully engaged and interested in the conversation. It has been said, follow the 80-20 rule. 80% making direct eye contact with your partner and 20% your eyes are roaming as you think about what to say. Stay in the room, No I don’t mean physically leave the room, just focus on what your partner is saying. It can be a challenge as our minds sometimes wander,which is especially hard if you are talking to someone who speaks very slow. This will help you to know when to respond which can help build rapport. Always give verbal feedback. There is nothing worse than when you are talking to someone and the just look at you and don’t say a word! How does that make you feel? A nod, smile or some other way to acknowledge...
by stevengconnelly@aol.com | Mar 18, 2016 | Uncategorized
Have you ever been in a conversation with someone and you can’t get a word in? After over 35 years my friend Joe and his wife decided to sell their house, it’s not they were unhappy with their home, things just change over time, once a quiet neighborhood in the country with an occasional car has developed into a place of constant noise and traffic. Last weekend I helped them move, their new house is all on one floor located on a very quiet street in eastern Massachusetts. On Monday I met a client for lunch, I asked him how his weekend was he replied “very nice.” and yours? I told him I helped my friend Joe move to eastern Massachusetts, he replied, I grew up in eastern Massachusetts! Over the next hour I sat there and listened to him tell me stories of the things that he and his family did when they lived there. However I did find each story quite fascinating. After lunch we shook hands and he said how much he had enjoyed our conversation…I thought to myself, how much he had enjoyed the conversation? I hardly said a word. I couldn’t have said anything even if I wanted to unless I changed the subject. I sat there and listened to him because I was interested and he could feel it. I had asked him questions and intently listened. Do you think I would have made a good impression if I did not listen to what my client had to say that day ? It has been said it’s better to be a good listener...
by stevengconnelly@aol.com | Mar 5, 2016 | Uncategorized
One of if not the biggest challenge in our personal or business life is getting our point of view across to another person, we know what we want but no matter what we say they just don’t seem to listen? sometimes we end up in an argument !! Even if you convince that person you are right and they are wrong, their personal pride would make it difficult for them to back down in future subjects which they may not agree with. When I was a foreman on a construction site a few years ago I had the responsibility of overseeing the success of each project I was on, the job was a challenge, getting the guys to see my point of view on the overall project seemed to be a daily struggle. Sometimes I would get angry at them for not getting the work completed on time or argue with them, that they should just do as I say… One day I was asked to go to another site for a day and oversee another project. I was worried the guys would not do the work I had set up for them to do that day we were on a very tight schedule so there was no margin for mistakes, so I made a decision to put my best man Mike in charge, I told him There was another project I needed to work at tomorrow and I was putting him in charge for the day, I explained to Mike the company was growing and they were looking for people like him to be the foreman on up...
by stevengconnelly@aol.com | Feb 26, 2016 | Uncategorized
Have you ever tried to get someone to do something you wanted to do but no matter what you say or do the just seem to not listen ? Yet when someone you know tells you to do the same thing you just do it ? Why is that ?? At age 38 Charles Schwab was appointed the first president of the newly formed United States Steel Company in 1921, his salary was over a million dollars a year, that’s more than three thousand dollars a day ! Why ? Was he an expert in steel manufacturing? Did he have more knowledge than other people ? Charles Schwab had a special gift…he had an ability to deal with people… When asked how he was able to deal with people he said: “I consider my ability to arouse enthusiasm among my people the greatest asset I possess, and the best that in a person is by appreciation and encouragement. There is nothing else that so kills the ambitions of a person as criticisms from superiors. I never criticize anyone. I believe in giving a person incentive to work. So I am anxious to praise but loath to find fault. If I like anything, I am hearty in my appreciation and lavish in my praise.” You might be in business or perhaps in you personal life, Getting people motivated to do what you want them to do can be a challenge, Instead of getting frustrated take a step back. Would getting angry get them excited ? or telling them to just do as I say ? Would that get you motivated...
by stevengconnelly@aol.com | Feb 20, 2016 | Uncategorized
This past week I met happy people everywhere I went… The grocery store The gas station Getting a coffee at Dunkin Donuts The hardware store The parking lot In the elevator At a meeting Walking around down town Buying a newspaper At lunch with a client Then it dawned I was getting what I was looking for…Over the years I have learned, what we focus on determines our daily habits. Yet for most people the focus for the day is, get up, get dressed, fight traffic to get to work, hurry all day to get the work done, fight traffic going home, eat dinner, looking back on the day grateful it’s over ! sound familiar ? Instead of being grateful another day of your life is over why not start each day being grateful for another day !! First Write 3 things you’re grateful for each day onto an index card, I now have literally hundreds of them, today I wrote: 1) Grateful for my life When I read this over and over again I never thought about how grateful I am to be here, After all these years I’ve been taking my life for granted…Although I can’t reverse sand upward in the hour-glass of life, from now on I will live this day as if it is my last. 2) Grateful for Sunrise This reminds me that every day is a new day, never will I be satisfied with yesterdays accomplishments, today the sunrise only happens once and with that all my efforts are focused on my tasks of today. 3) Grateful for yesterdays challenges As if I’m a...
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